Having BPD is a constant battle with the sense of abandonment. I have yet to isolate when and where this feeling started but I know that right now and for most of my adult life I have struggled with this feeling. What is toughest about this part about this illness is that I really like […]
They say that knowledge is power but right now I don’t feel so powerful, in fact the some of the things that I know make me feel so very weak. This week has been increasingly difficult to get through and despite hoping that things will get better, I know that it is going to get […]
Lately I have been finding it increasingly challenging to even commit to coming here and allowing myself to share what is going on in my life. This challenge has proven to be all consuming as I dart back and forth in my mind from trying to deal with the emotional turmoil that surrounds me. I […]
Lately my posts here have been getting progressively darker. For those reading them it may seem that I am in a downward spiral and that with my ongoing challenge of living with Borderline Personality Disorder there is a risk for truly bad things are afoot. I would not entirely disagree with that assessment. In fact […]
I sit here preparing for my weekly therapy session and think about all the things that have changed recently in my life. The loss that I have experienced in the past 6 months has been incredible, the changes in my life and lifestyle have been dramatic, my health while stable is still in question every […]
Too much has happened to me in recent days and weeks to truly put into words how I am feeling but I will try. As my world that I have so carefully built up around me crumbles, the sense of fear and helplessness seems to want to over take me at every turn. I am […]
Life is filled with many cross roads. There comes a time when all things that exist must make a choice…to exist or to cease to exist. Each day I wake up and make a choice to exist. To move on. To live. To thrive. Most days I don’t second guess this choice but then there […]