It has been a while since I took the time to share my thoughts here. It has been a really challenging few months as I was indecisive about many aspects of what my life was and is. I have continued to practice the skills that I have learned but I have regressed many times into the dark thoughts that used to control my every action.
My life since my daughter moved away to college has been filled with many nights of just sitting and pondering my existence.
The dark thoughts come and go…but recently I made a conscious decision to really get out there and look for some happiness…I deserve it.
I am not going to make the same old mistakes that have controlled me in the past, this reset is different.
I am stronger because of my understanding of what makes me think and act the way I do. At the end of the day, my borderline does not control me…I control it (mostly).
Is there true happiness out there for me, without having to live in the extremes? I think so. Life is not about All or Nothing…it is about the little moments that connect us all.